I turn 35 in a little under one month. The funny thing is, I don't feel at all like an adult. I've heard tons of other people my age say the same thing, but in my case I think it's because I lost my innocence at a very early age and have always felt the way I do now.
It probably started when I was 5 years old when my parents thought I was old enough to understand what being adopted meant. What they said: some other woman carried me in her tummy, but then they rushed to find me as soon as I was born. What I heard: wah, wah, wah - kind of like Charlie Brown in school.
My mother (the one that I grew up with) continued with this type of talk for many years after this - going so far as to say I was so cruel to leave her as a fetus (!) only to have to have her fly all the way to Kansas to get me back. What kind of parent talks about adoption in this way? Not any other adoptive parent I've ever met.
My brother, three and half years older than me, was told about his adoption at the same time. Not because we were adopted as brother and sister, but because it was time to tell him about his adoption and I guess while they were at it, my parents figured they may as well get mine over with too. Gotta love multi-tasking the difficult parenting topics.
I guess my brother must have figured out at some point in the next couple of years that this meant that I wasn't really his blood relative. This spelled nothing but trouble for me.
It appeared as if, in his mind, not being a blood relative was an open invitation to start molesting me.
I don't really remember how it started, probably something along the lines of "I'll show you mine if you show me yours". You know, normal stuff. I was probably around 7 or 8 years old. But, somehow, it turned into something so awful. It got to the point where he got our best friend (a girl) involved and he was molesting us both. I'm pretty sure I didn't lose my virginity to him, but I did lose my chance at a fairly normal childhood.
This went on until I was 13 years old. Not once did I tell my parents, they never believed me when I said anything anyway. They always took my brother's side. So, why would this be any different - that's what I thought at the time anyway. Also, I guess in some weird way, I thought all brother-sister relationships were like this since I didn't know any different.
At some point during the 8th grade, I must have told another friend a small amount of what was happening (it was either that or, she figured it out on her own). I'm pretty sure that if I did tell her I would have begged her to keep it a secret, since at that age I knew it was wrong. At that point I didn't want my parents finding out because my brother was also violent, and I knew he would have made my life even more miserable if they were to find out and confront him with anything. Unfortunately, my friend told her mother who told someone at school. When the school called my parents in to talk to them about it, their response to them was that I was lying. They even took me to a shrink to find out why I would lie about such a thing. I didn't say a word to the shrink. Why bother, was my opinion. To my knowledge, my parents never asked my brother about it, probably because they were so convinced of my lie that they didn't want to upset him with it.
A few months after I got married, I got the courage up to tell my new husband all about what went on between me and my brother. He was furious! A few years later he brought it up to my mother, and again my mother said I was lying. She said that my brother had admitted to doing it with our best friend, but swore up and down he had never done anything to me. As far as I know, my mother went to her grave believing him and not me.
When deciding when to have children of my own, I always had this nagging fear that I never told my husband about. When I was pregnant with my first, I was sad to find out that it was a boy. I was so afraid that if I had then gone on to have another baby that turned out to be a girl, that the same thing would happen to her. It terrified me.
It terrified me so much that when I finally did get pregnant with my second child I did not want to find out what I was having before it was born. In my mind, if I didn't know beforehand I wouldn't have to worry about it until the kid was born. Shockingly, this way of thinking only kind of worked. However, I was so relieved when the baby was born and turned out to be a boy. Now, I know that doesn't mean nothing can ever happen to him - I'm not that naive. But, I do hope that it means it will be far less likely than if I had had a girl.
Now, whenever people ask me whether I'm going to try for a girl, I always joke and refer to the snip. But, deep down I think to myself "No way! I don't want that girl to go through what I went through."
I haven't spoken to my brother since I was 13. And, as you can imagine, I don't really ever talk about him. But, I said something yesterday at dinner about my brother - even though it was just yesterday, I can't remember what it was about - but it prompted my oldest son to say "I didn't know you have a brother". Oops. I guess I either should've told him sooner or kept my mouth shut. I managed to brush it off and told him and my other son that my brother was not a very nice person and that they would never meet him.
But this leads to an even bigger question - what do I tell him (and eventually his brother) about why I my brother isn't a very nice person? And, when will he be old enough to understand adoption so I can tell him that I have three half-sisters I only met when I was 30? I hate that I have this past I can't really be open about with my kids. It feels like a secret I never wanted to have to keep.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Friday, March 2, 2012
Changes
See, look, I told you it would happen again.
Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I suppose an update is in order.
Last time I posted I was still waiting for my official CPA License. That finally came some time in the middle of January. Also, the last time I posted, I had been in the middle of potentially getting a new job. You might be interested to know that I still have the same job I've always had. The job with the Major Corporation just didn't work out. They didn't really make me an official offer, but what they did do was give me a very stringent ballpark. A ballpark I didn't even need to think about to refuse.
You see, while the amount of money they were offering was more than I was making now, it did not make up for what I would be losing. It didn't account for the fact that I would have to move to Denver where the cost of living is higher than where I am now. It didn't account for the fact that I would be cutting my annual leave allotment in half. It didn't account for the fact that I would be working many more hours a week than I currently do. And finally, it didn't account for the fact that my health insurance would be considered sub-par to what I'm getting now - which apparently is the Cadillac of health insurance.
So, I turned it down before I put any more time into the vetting process. And, to be honest, I haven't regretted it for one minute - aside from the fact that I was looking forward to a change.
Now, what wasn't happening the last time I posted.
We have decided to go ahead with the move to the UK.
Did you read that? WE ARE GOING AHEAD WITH OUR MOVE TO THE UK!
We are very excited about this.
The last time we were considering this, it was only if we had jobs to go to first. This time, that isn't even close to being the case. This time, we have already purchased our one way tickets to the UK and we're not even looking for jobs. We're currently pinching as many pennies as we can so we have enough to live on for a little bit once we get there. This will give us the opportunity to be a little more picky about the jobs we look for and accept.
Something else we've decided to do is a cross-country roadtrip for a few weeks before our flight. We'll start here in Colorado, head out to Southern California, and then make our way back east for our final destination of Boston, MA. Our flight leaves July 27th.
We're very excited, but have a lot to do. To chronicle it all, my husband has started a blog for the family. Nothing has been posted to it yet, so I'll wait until then to share the URL - if I share it at all. I may just keep it private for now since personal information will be included there. We'll see. Right now I'm leaning towards sharing since I'm tired of the secrecy. I'll let you know what I decide.
Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I suppose an update is in order.
Last time I posted I was still waiting for my official CPA License. That finally came some time in the middle of January. Also, the last time I posted, I had been in the middle of potentially getting a new job. You might be interested to know that I still have the same job I've always had. The job with the Major Corporation just didn't work out. They didn't really make me an official offer, but what they did do was give me a very stringent ballpark. A ballpark I didn't even need to think about to refuse.
You see, while the amount of money they were offering was more than I was making now, it did not make up for what I would be losing. It didn't account for the fact that I would have to move to Denver where the cost of living is higher than where I am now. It didn't account for the fact that I would be cutting my annual leave allotment in half. It didn't account for the fact that I would be working many more hours a week than I currently do. And finally, it didn't account for the fact that my health insurance would be considered sub-par to what I'm getting now - which apparently is the Cadillac of health insurance.
So, I turned it down before I put any more time into the vetting process. And, to be honest, I haven't regretted it for one minute - aside from the fact that I was looking forward to a change.
Now, what wasn't happening the last time I posted.
We have decided to go ahead with the move to the UK.
Did you read that? WE ARE GOING AHEAD WITH OUR MOVE TO THE UK!
We are very excited about this.
The last time we were considering this, it was only if we had jobs to go to first. This time, that isn't even close to being the case. This time, we have already purchased our one way tickets to the UK and we're not even looking for jobs. We're currently pinching as many pennies as we can so we have enough to live on for a little bit once we get there. This will give us the opportunity to be a little more picky about the jobs we look for and accept.
Something else we've decided to do is a cross-country roadtrip for a few weeks before our flight. We'll start here in Colorado, head out to Southern California, and then make our way back east for our final destination of Boston, MA. Our flight leaves July 27th.
We're very excited, but have a lot to do. To chronicle it all, my husband has started a blog for the family. Nothing has been posted to it yet, so I'll wait until then to share the URL - if I share it at all. I may just keep it private for now since personal information will be included there. We'll see. Right now I'm leaning towards sharing since I'm tired of the secrecy. I'll let you know what I decide.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Good intentions, roads, paved, something something
Apparently I should never make promises. How long has it been since my last post? I don't even know and I'm too lazy (or, ashamed) to look. So, no excuses from me, just the promise that it will likely happen again.
So, on to my life:
A lot has been going on. I finally took, and passed, the Ethics Exam required to become a CPA and submitted my application for licensure. However, it seems to be taking an extra long time for the folks at NASBA to approve my application. I submitted my application at the beginning of this month and I still haven't heard anything. Oh well, I'll be a CPA sometime in the near future.
In September, I applied for a job at a Major Corporation in Denver. Sometime towards the end of October I started the interview process with them. It started with a phone interview, where we discussed the possibility of two different positions with that company. A few days later I had to take two computer assessments - one that was a shortened version of the SAT's, and the other testing my knowledge about computers and social networking. Evidently, I did well enough on both of those because a few weeks later I was contacted to schedule a face-to-face interview.
Now, the scheduling of the interview was a major screw-up!
First, they wanted me to schedule the interview that week. I couldn't do that because I was traveling for work and wouldn't be back in town until the next week - which was Thanksgiving week. So, I told the recruiter that I was available Thanksgiving week or the next. After that I received an email from her scheduling me for an interview the Monday AFTER Thanksgiving.
Well, the Monday BEFORE Thanksgiving I got home from work to a message from the recruiter asking me where I was, was I ok, they had been expecting me that morning!
Oh shit, I thought. I must've screwed it up. But, I looked at the original email and it turned out I hadn't screwed anything up, they had. So, I called the recruiter and left a message telling her that the information I had showed that the interview wasn't until next week. I also forwarded her the original email. A couple of days later I received another email from the recruiter saying that there must have been a mix-up on her end (no apology) and asked if I could be there on December 5th, instead of November 28th since one of interviewers wasn't going to be there that week. I agreed.
December 5th came, and I arrive at the location on time only to wait half an hour to see the recruiter before being taken up to the interviewer.
The interview was to take place in two parts. I was supposed to meet with the manager of the department and then the VP. Each meeting was to take an hour.
I met with the manager, and the interview went pretty well. Then she was taking me to the VP's office. The VP HAD NO IDEA I WAS COMING! And, to make matters worse, he said "isn't this the same person that stood us up a few weeks ago?" Ack! The recruiter had never told them that it was her fault! As it turned out, since the VP didn't know I was coming, he had no room in his schedule to meet with me and sent me on my way.
I felt dejected, and was supremely pissed. I had to take a day off of work for this!
A couple of days later I received a call from the manager I had met with asking if I was still interested in working for the company - you know, since they are so disorganized.
I decided to give them another chance. She said that since everything had been so majorly screwed up, would I be willing to meet them in a location between where I live and their office. She wanted to meet for dinner and drinks with me, the VP, and another manager.
To say I was petrified is an understatement. But I did agree to the meeting.
Dinner, drinks, and the rest of the interview went very well and now I'm waiting for paperwork to be completed and reviewed before an offer is made.
I'm still not sure if I'm going to accept it. I've done some research on what it's like to work for this company, and based on what I'm finding, the offer has to be something spectacular for me to accept it.
So, for now, I'm in a holding pattern. I feel like I've been here all year and it's beginning to get really old. I just want to know what my near future is going to look like. Will we be moving? Will we have to find another daycare, school, doctor? I'm sick of the uncertainty. I'm gainfully employed now, but my job has gotten mundane and boring so I'm trying to keep my options open.
Hopefully I know soon, one way or the other.
So, on to my life:
A lot has been going on. I finally took, and passed, the Ethics Exam required to become a CPA and submitted my application for licensure. However, it seems to be taking an extra long time for the folks at NASBA to approve my application. I submitted my application at the beginning of this month and I still haven't heard anything. Oh well, I'll be a CPA sometime in the near future.
In September, I applied for a job at a Major Corporation in Denver. Sometime towards the end of October I started the interview process with them. It started with a phone interview, where we discussed the possibility of two different positions with that company. A few days later I had to take two computer assessments - one that was a shortened version of the SAT's, and the other testing my knowledge about computers and social networking. Evidently, I did well enough on both of those because a few weeks later I was contacted to schedule a face-to-face interview.
Now, the scheduling of the interview was a major screw-up!
First, they wanted me to schedule the interview that week. I couldn't do that because I was traveling for work and wouldn't be back in town until the next week - which was Thanksgiving week. So, I told the recruiter that I was available Thanksgiving week or the next. After that I received an email from her scheduling me for an interview the Monday AFTER Thanksgiving.
Well, the Monday BEFORE Thanksgiving I got home from work to a message from the recruiter asking me where I was, was I ok, they had been expecting me that morning!
Oh shit, I thought. I must've screwed it up. But, I looked at the original email and it turned out I hadn't screwed anything up, they had. So, I called the recruiter and left a message telling her that the information I had showed that the interview wasn't until next week. I also forwarded her the original email. A couple of days later I received another email from the recruiter saying that there must have been a mix-up on her end (no apology) and asked if I could be there on December 5th, instead of November 28th since one of interviewers wasn't going to be there that week. I agreed.
December 5th came, and I arrive at the location on time only to wait half an hour to see the recruiter before being taken up to the interviewer.
The interview was to take place in two parts. I was supposed to meet with the manager of the department and then the VP. Each meeting was to take an hour.
I met with the manager, and the interview went pretty well. Then she was taking me to the VP's office. The VP HAD NO IDEA I WAS COMING! And, to make matters worse, he said "isn't this the same person that stood us up a few weeks ago?" Ack! The recruiter had never told them that it was her fault! As it turned out, since the VP didn't know I was coming, he had no room in his schedule to meet with me and sent me on my way.
I felt dejected, and was supremely pissed. I had to take a day off of work for this!
A couple of days later I received a call from the manager I had met with asking if I was still interested in working for the company - you know, since they are so disorganized.
I decided to give them another chance. She said that since everything had been so majorly screwed up, would I be willing to meet them in a location between where I live and their office. She wanted to meet for dinner and drinks with me, the VP, and another manager.
To say I was petrified is an understatement. But I did agree to the meeting.
Dinner, drinks, and the rest of the interview went very well and now I'm waiting for paperwork to be completed and reviewed before an offer is made.
I'm still not sure if I'm going to accept it. I've done some research on what it's like to work for this company, and based on what I'm finding, the offer has to be something spectacular for me to accept it.
So, for now, I'm in a holding pattern. I feel like I've been here all year and it's beginning to get really old. I just want to know what my near future is going to look like. Will we be moving? Will we have to find another daycare, school, doctor? I'm sick of the uncertainty. I'm gainfully employed now, but my job has gotten mundane and boring so I'm trying to keep my options open.
Hopefully I know soon, one way or the other.
Friday, November 4, 2011
Crappy Day Present Personality Profile
I was about to sign-up on the registry for Doing My Best's Crappy Day Present Registry and decided it was probably too much information for a comment. So, I'll leave my answers to the prompts here.
Here goes:
Here goes:
- What is your favorite color?
- That depends. It used to be any color green, but my mother in law has overused this knowledge for the last 17 years and I think I'm over green. Now, it's a toss-up between cobalt blue or maroon.
- What is your favorite season?
- My favorite season has always been spring. It used to be because my birthday is in the spring, but now it's for a variety of reasons. First, I love the way nature looks with the new green coming in. Second, the smells of all of the flowers coming out. Finally, both of my kids were born in the spring. It just represents a new beginning to me.
- What is your favorite treat?
- I'm not sure I really have one. I'm not much of a sweets person, so if I'm wanting something to eat but not really hungry I go for the savory. Potato Chips are my absolute favorite snack - especially if I can dip them in my absolute favorite spinach dip (you should get some for yourself, it's sooooo good).
- What is your favorite scent?
- This is an easy one. My favorite scent, hands down, is Lilac. Maybe that's why I like spring so much, it's when the Lilac's come out.
- What is your favorite
ice creamcoping mechanism? - Sleep. I can deal with anything if I get enough sleep. As far as ice cream goes, the only one I really like is Ben & Jerry's Mint Chocolate Cookie. When it was off the shelves for a while several years ago I was devastated. I was especially devastated when I was pregnant with my first and couldn't have my favorite flavor. Did you know the reason why it went off the shelves for a while? I used to live down the road from the factory in Vermont and I asked them one time. It was because it used to be called Mint Oreo and Nabisco was pissed they weren't getting any royalties from the use of their name. So, B&J's had to come up with a new name and a new cookie to make the ice cream. Apparently, that took them years to accomplish. I'm soooo glad it's back.
- What do you like to do in your free
timemoments? - I don't really have any hobbies. I like to roam around the internet reading blogs and tweeting. Aside from that, I'm trying to make photography my hobby. It used to be, and I was pretty good at it, but then kids and life got in the way and I stopped doing it. What I really need is to figure out how to use Photoshop, maybe then I'll have more drive to do it.
- What do you not enjoy doing, and why, but have to do anyway?
- I'm not a huge fan of cooking, but I'm really good at it. Also, if we want to eat something that isn't take out, I have to cook. My husband is good at boiling water and putting a frozen pizza in the oven - that's about it. In fact, he tells people he burns salads when they ask him if does any of the cooking.
- If someone gave you money with the instruction that you had to spend it on something frivolous for yourself, what would you buy?
- This is a tough one, it's been so long since I've been able to do this I don't know what it would be. It would probably be something having to do with a getaway with my friends so I can have some time away from my kids and husband.
- Do you have any decorating themes in your home/office?
- There's lots of blue in my house, but I really think that is a result of the fact that I'm the only girl in the house. Other than that, I'm not really a decorator. I'd be happy with nothing but family pictures on the wall.
- Is there something that you REALLY, REALLY like? (Burt's Bees, horses, cats, fairies, unicorns, birds, patriotic stuff, babies, chocolate, Diet Coke, etc....)
- I'm a horse lover. I started riding when I was 5 and was hooked. When I started sleepaway camp at the age of 9, I always stayed an extra 2 weeks for the intensive horseback riding camp. By the time I was 15 I was teaching english riding and jumping. In fact, I was originally going to be a Veterinarian. Unfortunately reality set in, and accounting seemed more practical.
- What is the VERY! BEST! present you have ever received and why was it the best?
- A 6 pack of Peppermint Mocha Creamer. I'm a mint lover and my husband knows this. He also knows that the Peppermint Mocha Creamer is only available around christmas. So, he went online and purchased 6 containers of the powdered stuff and gave it to me for christmas one year. I loved it because it showed that he really knew me and wanted to make me happy all year.
- I have a tendency to develop really bad acne. Right now I'm on six different medications due to a horrific flare up while I was studying for the CPA exams. So, no face creams, ok?
- I have really dry skin (due to the acne medication, and the altitude I live in). Not only do I have really dry skin, but my elbows are so dry it's almost disgusting. I've tried everything I can think of for them and nothing has worked. So, if you have miracle solution I'd love to know about it.
- I'm always cold. Especially at work, where it seems the air conditioning runs year-round.
- I don't like nuts in my food, but I'll eat them by the handful.
Monday, October 17, 2011
The Greenest I've Ever Been
I posted this on one of the other blogs I used to write on. It still makes me smile to read it and thought I'd share it here.
With all of this talk lately on what we can do to get "greener", it got me thinking about what I do to makes this world a little easier to live in.
We can't afford to pay the trash company to recycle our recycleables, so we do a few things ourselves. It's not as much as if we could afford to recycle, but it's better than nothing.
Even though we put in a semi-decent effort now, you should have seen me the summers from 1986 through 1993.
I went to camp. A camp like no other. I don't think you would find a place anywhere close to being similar now, unless you were on some sort of commune. Unfortunately, it's closed now so you can't experience it for yourselves. Looking back, it was actually kind of gross. I'm not sure how many people were there, but I think it ranged somewhere between 60 and 100, depending on the year.
The camp used a well system, and to make sure there was enough water for food preparation, drinking, the animals, and cleaning up after meals, all of the people making up the camps population were limited to 1 shower a week. That's right folks, just 1 shower a week.
Let me clarify.
I guess we were really limited to 1 hot shower a week. The rest of the time we were entitled to take a colder than the arctic shower in the waterfall anytime we wanted (using bio-degradable soap) if it was running - i.e., it hadn't been stopped by beavers upstream. Yep, parents knew about this little deal. And yep, they kept sending their children back year after year. Now, I get a little grossed out if my kids go three days without a bath - and they hardly do anything to get dirty!
Ok, so you're thinking "what could these children be doing to really warrant more shower time - 1 a week sounds reasonable. Besides they're probably swimming a ton anyway." For some, that would be correct. However, for the select few die-hard horse lovers it was a different story. I was one of those horse lovers. I was in the barn every day, either riding or mucking stalls or both. Yes, I was swimming almost everyday too (my nickname was "the fish"), but do you really think that was enough to get the grime of the barn off? Hardly. Let's not forget about the fact that I was sleeping outside for a good chunk of the time that I was there too. One summer, I got home and took a nice long shower and shaved my legs. Prior to this, I had thought I was really tan. However, it turned out that I was just really dirty. After shaving my legs they were white as ghosts - apparently, along with the hair I had shaved off the dirt too.
The water conservation was not the only environmentally friendly "activity". We also composted whatever leftover food items we could, and what we couldn't was given to the pigs to eat. We had a cow on site to give us fresh milk. We grew some of our own veggies. We even had a few outhouses (again, saving water).
So yes, this was the greenest time of my life so far. Unfortunately, it wasn't just the environment we were making greener, it was also the people we dared to tell about the goings on in this little community we called home for 8 weeks every year.
I guess you're a little greener now too. You can thank me later.
With all of this talk lately on what we can do to get "greener", it got me thinking about what I do to makes this world a little easier to live in.
We can't afford to pay the trash company to recycle our recycleables, so we do a few things ourselves. It's not as much as if we could afford to recycle, but it's better than nothing.
- We recycle all of our paper at the local recycling dropoff (free) located at any one of the five Wal-Marts in our "town". (Yes, I know, any "town" with five Wal-Marts isn't actually a town, but I just can't bring myself to call it a city - I did grow up in The Big Apple, after all!)
- We get our milk delivered every week. I know this doesn't sound like doing something for the environment, but the milk company takes back the empty milk containers and reuses them for more milk. Plus, it's delicious!
- We turn off lights in any room we're not in - and we're normally all in the same room. Driving down our street at night, you would think no one actually lives in our house, it's pitch black.
- We use fluorescent light bulbs. Yes, I know they don't last as long if they are used upside down, but it's still better than a regular bulb, right?
- We don't flush the toilet after every single pee - if it's yellow, let it mellow...you get the idea.
- We have our water heater turned way down, and it still produces enough hot water for our family.
- We wash all of our clothes in cold water.
Even though we put in a semi-decent effort now, you should have seen me the summers from 1986 through 1993.
I went to camp. A camp like no other. I don't think you would find a place anywhere close to being similar now, unless you were on some sort of commune. Unfortunately, it's closed now so you can't experience it for yourselves. Looking back, it was actually kind of gross. I'm not sure how many people were there, but I think it ranged somewhere between 60 and 100, depending on the year.
The camp used a well system, and to make sure there was enough water for food preparation, drinking, the animals, and cleaning up after meals, all of the people making up the camps population were limited to 1 shower a week. That's right folks, just 1 shower a week.
Let me clarify.
I guess we were really limited to 1 hot shower a week. The rest of the time we were entitled to take a colder than the arctic shower in the waterfall anytime we wanted (using bio-degradable soap) if it was running - i.e., it hadn't been stopped by beavers upstream. Yep, parents knew about this little deal. And yep, they kept sending their children back year after year. Now, I get a little grossed out if my kids go three days without a bath - and they hardly do anything to get dirty!
Ok, so you're thinking "what could these children be doing to really warrant more shower time - 1 a week sounds reasonable. Besides they're probably swimming a ton anyway." For some, that would be correct. However, for the select few die-hard horse lovers it was a different story. I was one of those horse lovers. I was in the barn every day, either riding or mucking stalls or both. Yes, I was swimming almost everyday too (my nickname was "the fish"), but do you really think that was enough to get the grime of the barn off? Hardly. Let's not forget about the fact that I was sleeping outside for a good chunk of the time that I was there too. One summer, I got home and took a nice long shower and shaved my legs. Prior to this, I had thought I was really tan. However, it turned out that I was just really dirty. After shaving my legs they were white as ghosts - apparently, along with the hair I had shaved off the dirt too.
The water conservation was not the only environmentally friendly "activity". We also composted whatever leftover food items we could, and what we couldn't was given to the pigs to eat. We had a cow on site to give us fresh milk. We grew some of our own veggies. We even had a few outhouses (again, saving water).
So yes, this was the greenest time of my life so far. Unfortunately, it wasn't just the environment we were making greener, it was also the people we dared to tell about the goings on in this little community we called home for 8 weeks every year.
I guess you're a little greener now too. You can thank me later.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Excuses and Promises
Yes, yes I know it's been awhile. I really have no excuses aside from being really lazy.
In case you haven't twigged it yet, this blog is anonymous for a reason. I have no desire for anyone I know in real life to know about it. So, it's kind of hard to find time to blog without being questioned about why I'm typing so much on this here little computer doo-dad. When I do have time it's just so hard to get off the couch, or out of bed, to get my laptap which is alllll the way over there.
I know you probably don't care, but I work full time out of the house. The laptop I use for work blocks all blog-type sites. Besides, the computer still only has Internet Explorer 6 and makes doing anything online awfully difficult. So, no blogging during normal business hours unless I'm working from home and can have access to my personal laptop (which is what I'm doing right now). Add the normal busyness of having afterschool activities, dinner, and bedtime - I just don't want to do anything after 7:30pm.
So, why do I try an keep this blog? Because I enjoy it and the community it connects me to. Here I have another problem though.
Due to my limited access to blog-type sites during the work day, I can only read the blogs I follow off-line on my iPod Touch (no smart phone). I have the MoblieRSS app that downloads all of the blog updates for the day in the morning before I leave for work. This allows me to read my "stories" throughout the day without access to the internet as I have time. Unfortunately, this leads me to not comment on blogs that I would really like to comment on.
Reading offline is great until you really want to comment on something. Then, when you do have access to the internet the moment is gone, or someone else has said what you wanted to say and you just don't comment. Most of the people I follow on Twitter only know who I am through Twitter because I have never commented on their blog as Mrs. Commoner. I'm going to try to correct this.
A while ago, Ali pledged to comment on 20 blogs each day. I can't commit to that, because right now I don't have the time. However, I will commit to commenting on 5 blogs each day. Hopefully these comments will be more than just an "LOL" or an "I agree!", but I'm not making any promises beyond the five comments a day. Baby steps people. I'm also going to try to write at least one blog post a week. I know I want to be able to write more, but this is at least a start.
In case you haven't twigged it yet, this blog is anonymous for a reason. I have no desire for anyone I know in real life to know about it. So, it's kind of hard to find time to blog without being questioned about why I'm typing so much on this here little computer doo-dad. When I do have time it's just so hard to get off the couch, or out of bed, to get my laptap which is alllll the way over there.
I know you probably don't care, but I work full time out of the house. The laptop I use for work blocks all blog-type sites. Besides, the computer still only has Internet Explorer 6 and makes doing anything online awfully difficult. So, no blogging during normal business hours unless I'm working from home and can have access to my personal laptop (which is what I'm doing right now). Add the normal busyness of having afterschool activities, dinner, and bedtime - I just don't want to do anything after 7:30pm.
So, why do I try an keep this blog? Because I enjoy it and the community it connects me to. Here I have another problem though.
Due to my limited access to blog-type sites during the work day, I can only read the blogs I follow off-line on my iPod Touch (no smart phone). I have the MoblieRSS app that downloads all of the blog updates for the day in the morning before I leave for work. This allows me to read my "stories" throughout the day without access to the internet as I have time. Unfortunately, this leads me to not comment on blogs that I would really like to comment on.
Reading offline is great until you really want to comment on something. Then, when you do have access to the internet the moment is gone, or someone else has said what you wanted to say and you just don't comment. Most of the people I follow on Twitter only know who I am through Twitter because I have never commented on their blog as Mrs. Commoner. I'm going to try to correct this.
A while ago, Ali pledged to comment on 20 blogs each day. I can't commit to that, because right now I don't have the time. However, I will commit to commenting on 5 blogs each day. Hopefully these comments will be more than just an "LOL" or an "I agree!", but I'm not making any promises beyond the five comments a day. Baby steps people. I'm also going to try to write at least one blog post a week. I know I want to be able to write more, but this is at least a start.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Why can't I work for myself?
So, yeah. Now that I'm not moving to England anytime soon, I might regret the whole premise of this blog. On the upside, no one has come searching in the hopes of getting help with a similar move. So, maybe we were crazy to even consider it in the first place.
One of the posts on my other blog said that I was putting in extra time at work in an attempt to pay back the advanced sick leave I had to take when I had Ramsay. At the time of that post, he wasn't even two yet. I have no idea how much time I owed at that point, but when Liam tried to kill himself June of last year I had to have another week of sick leave advanced to me. I kind of wish my boss had refused to do it. Yes, it would have meant that week would have been upaid, but at least I would have had a light at the end of the tunnel, instead of adding another 40 hours to my debt.
Last October, Liam and I decided that we'd had enough of this hanging over my head and sought out the information necessary to pay the debt back with cash money.
Turns out, I could've asked for a bill at any time for any portion of the amount I owed. I wish I had known this from the get go. It would've made the situation a lot easier to handle.
Unfortunately, by the time we found this out, there was no way we would have been able to afford the balance due. So, we decided to wait until we figured out how much our tax return would be at the beginning of this year. Not only would waiting chip away 4 hours from the balance every 2 weeks. But it would also give us the opportunity to save for the inevitable bill.
In the beginning of March we filed our tax return and got our refund. So, I put in all the paperwork to request a bill.
I didn't get a bill until the beginning of May. As soon as I received it, I paid it. Silly me, I thought that meant as soon as my check cleared my sick leave would be restored to a positive balance. Oh boy, was I naive. I've worked here for over 6 years, you would think I would have learned by now nothing is ever that easy.
At the end of June my sick leave balance still wasn't restored. I called HR and spoke with someone who said she needed a copy of the spreadsheet I had created to determine the amount that I would need to be billed. She had that within seconds. Later that day I received an email from her saying that everything was fixed, have a nice life.
Yesterday I decided to look at my paycheck for the first time since June (hey, I'm paid salary, it's direct deposit, I have no need to look at every one). My sick leave balance was KIND OF fixed. And by KIND OF, I mean not at all. I was still negative. Granted, it wasn't nearly as negative as before, so something had been fixed, but I was still negative.
I was pissed. I called the same person in HR and asked what the problem was. Without looking into anything, she said it was because I hadn't paid it all back. Arghhh!! You can't be serious! I'm an accountant for pete's sake. I'm not under any delusions that accountants don't make mistakes, but I had had 3 other people in my office check my work before submitting the request for a bill, so I KNEW my math was right.
To say I got frustrated with her is an understatement.
After a lot of back an forth yesterday, I can now honestly tell you, my sick leave is POSITIVE. I have lived for the last 4 years without taking a sick day for myself (while I was pregnant I didn't take any time off since I knew I would have to save it for after the baby was born).
You don't know how happy this makes me.
One of the posts on my other blog said that I was putting in extra time at work in an attempt to pay back the advanced sick leave I had to take when I had Ramsay. At the time of that post, he wasn't even two yet. I have no idea how much time I owed at that point, but when Liam tried to kill himself June of last year I had to have another week of sick leave advanced to me. I kind of wish my boss had refused to do it. Yes, it would have meant that week would have been upaid, but at least I would have had a light at the end of the tunnel, instead of adding another 40 hours to my debt.
Last October, Liam and I decided that we'd had enough of this hanging over my head and sought out the information necessary to pay the debt back with cash money.
Turns out, I could've asked for a bill at any time for any portion of the amount I owed. I wish I had known this from the get go. It would've made the situation a lot easier to handle.
Unfortunately, by the time we found this out, there was no way we would have been able to afford the balance due. So, we decided to wait until we figured out how much our tax return would be at the beginning of this year. Not only would waiting chip away 4 hours from the balance every 2 weeks. But it would also give us the opportunity to save for the inevitable bill.
In the beginning of March we filed our tax return and got our refund. So, I put in all the paperwork to request a bill.
I didn't get a bill until the beginning of May. As soon as I received it, I paid it. Silly me, I thought that meant as soon as my check cleared my sick leave would be restored to a positive balance. Oh boy, was I naive. I've worked here for over 6 years, you would think I would have learned by now nothing is ever that easy.
At the end of June my sick leave balance still wasn't restored. I called HR and spoke with someone who said she needed a copy of the spreadsheet I had created to determine the amount that I would need to be billed. She had that within seconds. Later that day I received an email from her saying that everything was fixed, have a nice life.
Yesterday I decided to look at my paycheck for the first time since June (hey, I'm paid salary, it's direct deposit, I have no need to look at every one). My sick leave balance was KIND OF fixed. And by KIND OF, I mean not at all. I was still negative. Granted, it wasn't nearly as negative as before, so something had been fixed, but I was still negative.
I was pissed. I called the same person in HR and asked what the problem was. Without looking into anything, she said it was because I hadn't paid it all back. Arghhh!! You can't be serious! I'm an accountant for pete's sake. I'm not under any delusions that accountants don't make mistakes, but I had had 3 other people in my office check my work before submitting the request for a bill, so I KNEW my math was right.
To say I got frustrated with her is an understatement.
After a lot of back an forth yesterday, I can now honestly tell you, my sick leave is POSITIVE. I have lived for the last 4 years without taking a sick day for myself (while I was pregnant I didn't take any time off since I knew I would have to save it for after the baby was born).
You don't know how happy this makes me.
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